It's Finals' Week here on z'blog, and in honor of college exams everywhere (but especially in this neck of the woods), we here at z'bigchicken television studios are offering, for a limited time only, another test.
That's right, tell your friends and come on by, because this week and this week only, we're going to up the stakes here and put the questions out to you and all your peeps.
First question, essay response, counts two points towards your final grade. Please limit essays to no more than one sentence.
1. Worth a zillion points*: During the days of social stratification, big chickens everywhere were said to be at the bottom of the heap. This is a downright lie, and a fowl mockery of my brethren to boot. Social commentary aside, I would now like to bring to you the Truth About Social Stratification: As Told By Your Big Chicken. However, time doesn't permit, so you'll need to do your own homework on this one, and just forego the lecture. No, I'll forego the lecture. Wait a minute, I'm getting confused here. Nevermind, just HURRY UP AND FINISH YOUR STUDYING BECAUSE THE TIME IS A'RUNNING OUT AND HOW DO YOU EVER EXPECT TO GET A DECENT JOB WITHOUT A COLLEGE EDUCATION ANYWAY UNLESS YOU'RE ONE OF THOSE PEEPS WHO WERE ABLE TO DO IT NOTWITHSTANDING? (Your big, hunky chicken is not one of those peeps. Not yet, anyway, hen-ce, the college education. BTW, I was trying to get another chicken reference in there with the hyphenated "hence." Didja catch that? Do ya think I'm trying too hard this morning? Listen, if you think I'm trying too hard this morning, shoot me an email over at zbigchicken at gmail dot com or leave a comment here at the end of the post and let me know. Who knows, you may be the Lucky Winner of a Trip to a Potluck Slash Gamenight with Z'bigchicken and Crew! But only if you aren't critical, because RIGHT NOW I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT. Oh, hey, I just thought of another chicken reference...I could say "lay off." Get it? Lay off. That's pretty cute. Okay, back to the exam. So, cut it out you guys because I need to FOCUS already.)
Question One on zbigchicken Blog's Final Exam. Here today, on the blog. (Continued from above the preceding diatribe.)
1. In the Third Edition of Big Chicken's Social Stratification - An In-Depth Look at Class Structure and Hierarchical Systems and How They Affect Modern Poultry Production, the Big Chicken maintained that there are clearly defined separations that form distinct boundaries among groups in modern American culture, and that the roles of each "class" within this structure were apparent, even to the layman (get it? another chicken reference). Define the the concept of "class," expand the boundaries to include the rest of the world, give a detailed discussion of each culture's view of class and hierarchical systems, and name the theory - all in one sentence. (Be sure to make it a sentence that isn't a run-on sentence, because you know how I feel about those. Of course, my assistant will probably be the one managing the grading anyway, but still, just humor me, okay? I've been working hard all semester and could sure use some time to just...."lay"....around.)
Your,
(Um, hmmmm, what sort of chicken shall I be today? I know! You can fill in the blank for me! Aw, gee, thanks, that's so nice of you! Here - I'll even put a nice space for you to write me in as the candidate for supreme ruler of the universe, no, I mean , the adjective. Which gives me another idea, then, for the adjective. I'm going to try something new here, so tell me what you think. Which one looks better?)
Your,
___________ Chicken (this is the one where you do my work for me by filling in the blank) OR
Your,
Adjectival Chicken+*
*I realize I changed the point structure arbitrarily and without notice, but I can do that. I tell you, the power of the blog never ceases to amaze me.
+*Does this second one make my thighs look fat?
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