Resume

RE:  Advertised Position of Traveling Chicken

To Whom It May Concern:
I am sending this letter in response to your solicitation for a human dressed up like a chicken who is willing to roller skate across the United States and make a movie about it.  Attached please find a copy of my current resume.  I think you will see that I have not only the necessary skills and qualifications that make me the ideal candidate for this position, but the kind of background that will enable me to take over your position within one year.  Possibly two.  That being said, I would be happy to work for and with you, and look forward to hearing from you.  I have absolute confidence that I will be a great pain in the asset to your organization.

Yours in earnest,
The Big Chicken
(resume transcript follows)