Hello,
My name is the Big Chicken, and my dream is to roller skate all across the land and make a movie about my funny adventures. This blog spot is a place for character development and experimentation, as well as just some good ol' chicken scratch. The screenplay my creator (and boss) is writing includes some fowl, funny humor, some breast jokes, and lots of exciting adventures on wheels. Of course, there are things that this Big Chicken needs to learn along the way, because I sure do have some issues, but what would an adventure be without a character journey? (Or "arc," as some smarmy folks like to call it. And I'm not going to name any names here, but D_____.) I am also a silent figure in the film.
If you would like to be a part of this great Chicken Skate Epic Adventure, I will gladly put you in touch with my creator. Together with our Chicken Skate Specialists, we are building a strong team with the necessary talent and expertise that it will take to make one hilarious film. Of course, when it's a hit, we're also prepared to take on the sequel. But, first things first! Come on in and take a load off, if wacky films are your thing.
For now, I need to get back to work helping the creator solicit sponsors for the first 'leg' of our journey. Thanks for stopping by, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours in Earnest,
The Very Big C
zbigchicken at gmail dot com that's with a z before the b
PS- You caught me on a good day. I'm really hardly ever this nice. BECAUSE I AM A VERY BIG, VERY TOUGH, AND VERY STRONG CHICKEN who is not afraid of anything. Except for maybe you. And your friends. And grizzly bears. Possibly wolves. Okay, definitely wolves. Songbirds kind of freak me out, too, a little bit. Sometimes. Then there are elephants, though I usually don't encounter them on the road, with the exception of circuses, zoos, and other wildlife parks. Other than that, I am fairly brave.*
*That was a lie.**
**I wasn't sure if I should put a lie in my introductory statement, but thought that I should really just go ahead and be up-front with you about everything, here at the start. Which is why I lied. So that I could be up-front with you. About the fact that I'm dishonest. Speaking of which, will there be any cash-handling involved with this position you advertised? Why? No reason. It's just very important to me that I make a good impression on you here at the start. So that you will trust me, and then leave me alone. With your things.
BTW, my name is J.L. Godwin, and I am responsible for this here mess.
UPDATE! 06December2010
Apparently there are more chickens in my psyche than I ever realized, because the main character, or protagonist, in my chicken skate film is not at all like this chicken here on the blog as described here on the "About Me and Contact" page a few months back. However, since I do like playing around with this character, too, I am just going to leave this all up here and keep rolling with this guy as well, at least on the blog. Who knows, maybe he'll make a special guest appearance in the film or something, so stay tuned!
Hey, did I tell you about my up-coming e-book? It's a free e-book, written by this zany blog-postin' chicken. I, J.L. Godwin, am acting as editor of z'book, and shall have it published electronically for you all just as soon as I can finish deciphering his deplorable (you see what's coming here, don't you?....) chicken scratch.